Years ago, before blogging was even popular, I blogged a lot. In fact it was long enough ago that I still had to explain what a blog was to people when I talked about it. People certainly didn’t have their whole life mediated by a screen, yet (the iPhone wasn’t even out… that’s hard to imagine). But at the time, my blog had a little traction, some people were following me, and getting my thoughts out there was really good for my soul. Good for my soul in some unexpected ways, actually. Myers-Briggs says I’m an ISTP. I’m a “5″ on the Enneagram. Both of those designations indicate that most of my world happens in the privacy of my head. I think to arrive at my feelings. I don’t verbally process too much or too well. Blogging was always an exercise in getting my process into the mix without a filter. Even right now, I don’t know what I’m going to write next. Blogging’s saving grace is that it is “hands on” enough to be something I need to figure out. I have to take it apart so I can put it back together even better.
When we planted Circle of Hope in South Jersey, my habit fell by the wayside in favor of a hands on application of the many things I had been writing and dreaming about. That was six years ago. The world changed. iPhone 6 just came out, btw.
Over the last few years, I’ve pondered getting the old blog going again but I couldn’t convince myself that I actually wanted to do it (and I don’t like doing things out of obligation). I like my interior world. The discipline of sitting down and writing publicly about the things that are awakening in me seems like it could drain me and I naturally resist that… my life feels draining enough! (that’s a mantra I’m working to overcome). I also don’t like the part of blogging nowadays that seems like “self-promotion.” Back in 2005 when I first got going in the blogosphere, Facebook wasn’t even mainstream… not many people were telling the world about the burrito they ate, the celebrity they hate, the way that they vote or the blog they just wrote. The world changed. I didn’t change with it (at least not that way).
But, recently several friends all said some version of the same thing: “You know, you have to start putting yourself out there a bit more if you want to effect change.”
So… here we go. I’m repenting in a way. I’m changing my mind. The blog is back. I’ll even say “look at me” on Facebook. If it’s a way to defeat the powers that be in the world, it’s probably worth investigating again. So my investigation has begun.